For the past couple of years, I have had the absolute privilege of coaching, mentoring and walking hand in hand on their journey, with some of the most incredible women who are absolutely ready to embrace the true essence of who they are while creating the life they deserve.
Knowing what I know now because of my own journey, and watching other women gracefully make their way through their own journey, there has been one common pattern I have noticed with every single one, and it is something a lot of people don’t really give you the ‘heads up’ on, yet I believe it is SUCH an important thing to fully become aware of before anyone starts a journey of healing and growth.
So what is it you ask?
Well let me start by saying this…as a coach, A LOT of people are under the impression that I NEVER stuff up. That my life is perfect, and that I am a spiritual hippie, living in the clouds (sounds fun though right? 😉 Well the truth is, I DO stuff up, my life ISN’T perfect, and yes I am a spiritual person living a very conscious life, with a high level of awareness of myself. And I have worked my little toosh off to get to the place I am within myself now. But there is something I want to make very clear. When I see my clients so bravely begin their journey of self-healing and growth, they feel empowered, excited, confident, happy, enlightened, free, the list goes on.
Until they hit their first bump in the road…and a lot of the time come to me in tears. A past client of mine exact words were…
Alissa, I have stuffed up! I was doing so well and then XYZ happened and I just did what I always do. I feel like such a failure, like I have gone backwards!
I gave her a tissue to wipe her tears, looked her in the eye and said ‘And you are going to keep ‘stuffing’ up for the rest of your life. You know why, because it is called being human. I stuff up all the time’
She looked up at me with a confused, but almost relieved look on her face and said ‘Really? So what does that mean then?’
It was then when I realised, that ANYONE who is about to embark on a healing journey needs to know, that you ARE going to stuff up (I like to call it a ‘growth bomb’), you are not going to get it right all the time, you are going to have shit days, sometimes weeks, and it is all perfectly normal! There is so much pressure on us to become this enlightened, ‘perfect’ person who just cruises through life and never makes mistakes, just because now we have ‘fixed’ a few things about ourselves. And it is a load of BS. The more I traveled through my own journey, it became so clear to me how important these moments of ‘growth bombs’ actually were. Why? Because tell me the last time you truly grew when something was a piece of cake for you achieve? It’s in the moments we find the most difficult to heal, that we truly grow and heal and evolve as a human being.
I came to love and accept my ‘growth bombs’, look them in the face and go ok, lets try this again! There is obviously still more growth to be made for me here, so bring it on! Yes in the beginning I would let my mean girl start bashing me because I didn’t get it right. But the important thing to remember is you have to learn to forgive yourself, know it is ok and let it go. Pick yourself up, dust off your shoes and keep walking. Don’t allow yourself to sit in your own pitty party for hour and hours. Yes, acknowledge that there is obviously still more work that needs to be done and then get excited about doing it! Because guess what, you have now reached another level of awareness within yourself, and that my girl, means you have grown and evolved. And isn’t that your mission?
The only difference between me, and a client that is yet to embark on a journey is the fact I have a certain level of awareness and consciousness which means I am able to navigate my way through life, having the ability and knowledge to choose what is best in each moment. But it certainly doesn’t mean for one second that I am not human just like you. I may know what I need to do, but it doesn’t mean I always do it.
So if you are about to take a leap and begin a journey that is not always easy, but so incredibly rewarding, because you are ready to step in to who you really are, then I am SO freaking proud of you, I really am. But please, I want you to really take this on board, and know that yes, you are going to slip sometimes and that is just part of your journey. Release the pressure off yourself that you have to be this perfect human (tell me what perfect is anyway) and just allow yourself to grow and evolve exactly how you need to. Drop any expectation of how you ‘think’ you need to grow, and instead, just show up daily to the commitment you have made to yourself to love and accept who you are fully, so you can create the life you are so deserving of.
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